E 240 3 Views of Time

As we start a new year, managing time is often a topic of discussion and resolution.  Today we take a look at 3 different views of time and how it weaves in with a contemplative life.

Mentioned in today’s episode:

Poem from the book, To Bless the Space Between Us

Please check out Christina’s Activity Prayer Book for children:

My Spiritual Journey

Or at SDI Press 

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Transcript

3 Views of time

[00:00:00] Well, hello. It's great to be with you. If you are listening in real time. Happy New Year. This is our first podcast of 2026 and we're grateful to welcome in the new year with all of our listening community. This is the time of year when many of us think about our time and how we want to spend it in a fresh new year, and Christine and I have had a practice, our entire marriage, where we take time at the end of the year to reflect and then make some intentions around how to spend our time in the new year.

And this was something that Christina did when she was single, and I have to admit that I was a bit resistant at first to sit down and do all this reflective work, I'm a more spontaneous person by nature. However, I loved my new wife and I could tell that this was important to her, and 25 years later, [00:01:00] I'm glad that this is part of our rhythm and it truly does help me think about time in a more contemplative and helpful way.

So today, rather than talk about New Year's intentions or resolutions or time management or things like that, we want to share three pieces of wisdom that we've gained over the years as it relates to how we view time. These frameworks have helped us see the world and how we interact with it in fresh ways.

And I do appreciate your flexibility to engage in this practice with me and it ha we have grown and it's fun to have all those years under our belt. So the first view is actually one that goes back to seminary days and learning about two Greek words for time. One is Chronos and one is Ros. And so Chronos is where we get the root of chronological time.

It's sequential time that's measured in hours, minutes, [00:02:00] months, years, so it tends to be dictated by clocks, calendars, and represents the measurement of time that's passing. Ros on the other hand, is a different word for time, and it represents a moment of significance or a spiritual opportunity. It's a divine moment or an interaction.

And I find this view of time helpful because it helps me to understand that time holds different weight or importance. I think we would all probably agree that most of life is Kronos, right? Most of life is the random Tuesday at three o'clock. In fact, when I was little, my mom used to tell me. Every day can't be a biggie, and I did not like it when she said that to me, but in hindsight, I actually get it because not every day is a trip to Disney World.

And at the time I, I needed to learn to appreciate the average days as much as the special times. And I think that this understanding of time allows me to sit more with nar ordinariness, is that a word? Yes. And see that, that can actually be special. And [00:03:00] so I was thinking like, it's interesting that I'm drawn to stories like Little House on the Prairie where it's actually a lot about the everyday life in a small town, it's chore, it's school, it's eating meals together, and yet something about that simple, ordinary life.

Draws us in as readers and people that maybe watch the program. And it also helps me pay attention to the special time and to notice, there's something special or unique about this moment or this opportunity. And I think having that framework of kudos, it's you know what? I think that this is one of those opportunities where I need to make a choice in life and maybe reallocate some time or reallocate money to go for it.

Because there seems to be a uniqueness to the opportunity presenting itself. And for me, those two Greek words have been really helpful in my first view of time.

Absolutely. And for those that maybe didn't understand or maybe hear it in a non-Greek way, my Greek wife saying it in the actual way that you say it in a Greek pronunciation, but I'm gonna say [00:04:00] Kairos in Kronos because I haven't mastered Greek or Greek. Pronunciation yet, but I really have appreciated learning about Kronos time and kairos time.

And like you're saying the value of the, the ordinary of the daily and learning to sense divine presence in the ordinary. And I was recently with one of my nieces and. She used the word, she used the word core memory and we were talking about this story between us.

We were doing a baptism and she was saying, yeah, I remember we were doing this baptism and Uncle Chris, you you practice on me. And it was. It was this core memory that I have of being dunked in the water, and I just thought, oh, she's using the word core memory to, to describe a kairos event in her life.

This thing that is [00:05:00] deeply and intrinsic to her memory and a spiritual moment for her. I've been wrapped up in the ordinary that I've even s the past couple years. I had to, when she said that, I thought, oh, I haven't really been that observant.

Recently of the kairos, the special events. And I think because of my personality, I'm a seven and I'm always chasing sort of the new adventure or the next big moment that I've actually had to learn to value the ordinary. But also there's something about the kairos time as well. And so I love that you're lifting up both of these ways of showing up in the world and being present to time.

So I really appreciate that.

So moving on. The second view of time that we have found helpful is the idea of a seven day weekend. And I learned this concept from a professional organizer, Lisa Woodruff. I listened to her podcast and she may have gotten it from somebody else. But the point is that the idea that the weekend isn't just one [00:06:00] unit.

But it's actually, if we want it to be seven different units of time and energy. For example, the energy that we might have on a Saturday morning oftentimes is different from that of a Sunday evening. And so she encouraged us to look at the weekend as seven chunks of time. So quote unquote, day one or the mini days are Friday evening, Saturday morning, afternoon and evening, and then Sunday morning, afternoon and evening.

And if we approach it that way, our weekend expands into seven many days, if you will. And so for example, we may choose to use our Saturday morning as a mini day for leisure, knowing that we wanna treat Sunday evening as a time to reset for the week ahead, review our meetings, prepare, things like that.

And so one day, if you will, gives the energy of slow relaxation while the other day is one of productivity and moving forward. And I found this concept really helpful, not just in my ordinary life, not in my Kronos life, but also in my Ros Like for example, [00:07:00] when I'm on vacation or have special times, like I now break up our vacations into morning, afternoon, and evening.

And so all of a sudden one day becomes actually three mini days, and it's given us such a nice balance of relaxation and getting out to do activities and be with other people. And when we view the weekend as a seven day weekend, I think it helps us to hit on the different aspects of rest and fund that each of our family members desire as well, because there's seven opportunities for it versus just, three or two even.

You have Saturday and Sunday is your weekend, where it's no, we have actually seven mini days. And quote, mini day can highlight one person's idea of relaxation and fun, et cetera, and it may not hit the other person, but it's a mini day enough to where it doesn't take up the whole day, and there's opportunities for other people to get in what's creative or engaging for them.

So I have found the seven day weekend concept to be super helpful.

Yes, you have, and you've instituted it in our family's rhythm. And I've really enjoyed the benefits of viewing sort of seven, many [00:08:00] days, if you will. It's been very beneficial to our life. I think just building off of that, I think this concept have, has really helped me to understand more, not just the day quote unquote, or the hours given to it, but the energies and that essentially there's seven.

Energy units, if you will, of the weekend, which again has felt really helpful to me. And so oftentimes for me a Saturday morning for me I do like when possible to sleep in, to have a slower morning. I know some people like to get out and jog or I have clients that I work with and actually Saturday morning they like to get up early and get a lot of.

Done. 'Cause it's a quiet household and then they're more present for the rest of the weekend. And that has felt really freeing to them 'cause they felt guilty about working on the weekend. But recognize that if they had some quiet time for a couple of hours on a Saturday morning, that actually set them up well for the rest of the weekend and not feeling like it had to bleed into everything.

'cause there was a boundary around it. It's okay, this is my mini day for two hours or three hours. Or if they wanted to get up super early or whatever. And then the other chunks of the day for other people. And so [00:09:00] I would say along with just the idea of the time around that, it's also to me been a really helpful energy allotment, if you will.

Yes. Energy is a great way of thinking of. Sort of those many days. So I appreciate that. I think the final view of time that we want to talk about is what I call slow time versus quick time. And this is the idea that the speed of time is relative time can expand or contract for each of us. And so for, this just happened today.

I was driving bus and I was. Picking up was picking up some, just three kids. I was driving a spec ed bus and. One of the kids the first kid that hops in the, in, in the vehicle gets to sit up front and, he was saying, gosh, don't you think December went by really quickly?

And I said. Yeah, it did. But tell me why it went by quickly for you. [00:10:00] And he's saying like the different parties that his family went to, the different church events. So he was thinking that it went by quickly because there was lots of experiences just even like 15 minutes later, I'm driving to pick up another student and the father is I've never been so excited to see this vehicle in my life.

The two weeks dragged on for him. And so just in the same amount of, just a short amount of time, I heard two different very different experiences. Of time and how people perceive time. And I'm sure we've all experienced this in our lives, but. If we take a look at it, I think it speaks to the fact that time moves at different speeds in our minds and in our emotions, and so the time is still the same.

It's the same two weeks, or it's the same 24 hours, but the pace makes it feel like it's dragging on or that it's life giving and energizing. Kind of A, [00:11:00] there's this way where we, we can't really believe that it's gone by, so slow time versus quick time.

Yeah. And I think this view is important to me because we don't experience time evenly, and I think that's what you're getting to.

And actually Einstein talked very briefly about time not being absolute that it exists in space and can move at different speeds, and that's on a metaphysical level. So then if we bring it down to a psychological or metaphorical. Level, I think the concept holds true in some contemplative ways that, time can expand or contract based on attention, emotion, and presence.

And so I have found that when I'm rushed or stressed, time can feel scarce. But when I'm grounded, time can feel a little bit more spacious and notice that the clock hasn't changed. It's that my nervous system has changed. And I think that this can go for large swaths of time. Like you're talking about the, the two week break in December and it could go by quickly or slowly or whatever, or I think it, it can apply to smaller [00:12:00] pieces of time, like transitions throughout the day. And so again, speaking from my own life, when I feel anxious and my nervous system is dysregulated, time shrinks. It's like we gotta get out the door, we're rushed. My nervous system is on high alert and it's let's go.

And it makes me feel like that five minute transition time is limited and we gotta get in and get out and do the things. But when I feel a little bit more regulated, time opens up. And when I'm not in a rush, I can leisurely grab my sunglasses or water bottle as I head out the door with ease versus running back because I forgot something or leaving and noticing down the road, oh, I don't have my water bottle with me today in that flustered state, because time felt so rushed versus the time feeling spacious.

And so I think that the concept of slow and quick time. Again, feels helpful in experiencing the fullness of life, whether that's the, winter break that you're describing or the transitions that we have. And again, it's not necessarily tied to concepts of time management or the latest planner or app to track our time.[00:13:00] 

Not to say those things don't have a place. I certainly use those things and they're helpful, but I think coming from the attention of our perspective of attention, emotion, and presence feels like a very different conversation. Yeah, absolutely. I think there's a poem that is, I would call it my life poem, that speaks of this.

And there's a phrase in the poem that says, learn to linger around someone of ease who feels they have all the time in the world. Stay away from those that are vexed in spirit is the other way that is presented. And so I have found that to be very valuable, particularly when we talk about rushed ness or we feel like,

I have planned and prepared, and I can, I could take this time and just be slow. And not to say that we don't have moments of where we really have to get some work done. I'm not saying that you have to [00:14:00] live your life that way, but also. Just paying attention to , how much of my time is rushed, how much of it is going from one thing quickly to the next thing rat race, if you will.

Or how much of it is just sauntering through, and I, yeah, I really appreciate being able to walk with individuals and. Just the spaciousness that opens up as , we're going on these walks versus, whenever you're power walking for exercise, like there's a much different feel whenever you walk at those two paces.

And both could be necessary or important, but I think just paying attention to what is needed for the certain seasons of your life. Yeah. And I think that, speaks to also our flow state when we're doing deep work. And again, we look up from our computer and time has passed by, to your point, about the quick and slow because we're in our flow state and we're really deep and really engaged in an idea [00:15:00] or concept or something that we're creating.

Or, it could be a recipe we're making. It could be a slideshow that we're presenting. It could be spreadsheets, whatever your thing is, right? Being in that flow state. But I think also this reminds me of just. Makes me think of this idea of wasted time that I think we often talk about or hear people talk about.

And I've noticed this too with screen time. And so when we sit down as a family the other night it was like this contrast of sitting down as a family. We had the fireplace going, we had candles, warm beverages, and we watched a show together and it was about 45 minutes. And noticing that, that felt very different from scrolling.

And one might say, if you like scrolled for 45 minutes, it's wow, I just wasted 45 minutes on reels. What? What happened at that time? I can't get it back. And I think for many of us, the idea of wasting time, I. Is not a neutral phrase. I think it carries with it guilt. It can carry anxiety or even sometimes like moral failure oh, I should be doing better or I'm wasting my time, especially this time of year.

If again, if you're listening in real time with the new year, [00:16:00] people tend to be a little bit more conscious about not wanting to waste time and be productive and hit goals or things like that. But I think if we look underneath, I think sometimes it can speak to a dysregulated nervous system, right? And so a regulated nervous system that spent 45 minutes watching a show felt slow.

It felt leisurely restorative. It's giving my brain a break from producing, but it felt like it gave me something back in return. But when my nervous system is overwhelmed. I look for numbness not meaning. And so at that point, time can feel like a waste because I feel like I spent that time quote unquote, and it didn't gimme any substantial return.

And I think in those situations, our time shrinks, it limits our imagination and engagement. And so I think that this third view of time and pace of time really can get into psychological and even a biological level where spacious time isn't necessarily something that we can achieve with our planners and apps.

Although I think tools are helpful, but I think that we can step into it as our body feels regulated and feels at a [00:17:00] place where we're actually o okay and safe and ready to engage with God or self or others. And just maybe a different view on that. That last piece there. Yeah, absolutely. And I think, one of the practices that, that we've instituted, like in that scenario that you painted the slow time of you, you're curating an experience, right?

You have lights, you have candles, you have beverages. And so intention is to have a wonderful connectedness. Or around art that you're watching together versus, I've got a couple minutes and I need some, I need to veg out for a minute., You haven't really been as intentional with that time, and so it's just like grasping at something that you need rather than curating.

And so one of the things that we do is we even just like we put our phones, we stack our phones that way there's not notifications coming in. While we're having, while we're curating, we're intentional about that experience. And [00:18:00] yeah, I really appreciate you bringing that up. And I think all of us want more connectedness in the time that we spend with others in the time that we spend doing certain things.

So yeah. Thanks. And I think, again, just to emphasize that, how we spend time isn't necessarily moral quote unquote, and I think too, yeah, there's certainly times where in a transition I'm not like, necessarily praying or breathing deep or whatever, and I do maybe do a wordle on my phone or something like that, connections or one of those things that I enjoy doing or checking out an Instagram or whatever.

But I think to me there's a difference between again, it's intentional and I feel like. I have slow time right now. I have five minutes where I'm waiting for the kids to get outta school if I'm doing a pickup or whatever it is. And I can choose to engage with that in a different way. That versus it feels like it's slipping away from me or I don't have any like control over it.

It's like a train off the rails or something like that. So yeah. I think that's really helpful.

 , I appreciate being able to have this conversation. And just a [00:19:00] quick recap on just the different ways that we can view time. The first that we talked about was Kairos or Kronos time. Or if you're a Greek ros. Absolutely. The second view of time is the seven day weekend. And last but not least, is slow time versus quick time.

And we hope that these ways of viewing time are helpful for you and the ways that you're engaging with time in this coming new year. And now is the part of the podcast where we talk about what we are into. So what are we into? Continuing with that Greek thing, I am into Melo Maana cookies, which is actually probably my favorite Greek cookie.

And I was recently visiting one of my elderly Greek aunts, and she's been known over the years for her cookies and [00:20:00] homemade bread and pastries. And so we were there and there was a bunch of cookies and there were two of these cookies left. And my cousin said, you know what? This is probably the last batch of cookies that.

She was gonna make because her mom's been declining cognitively, and so it's hard for her to follow sequences in preparing food. And I was so glad that she said that because rather than gobble up the cookie, I actually took the cookie, got a cup of coffee, sat next to my aunt, and I slowly ate this cookie and thought about how wonderful she's been in my life and.

It got me reflecting on passing on traditions with food but also having a new twist. We were talking about at the table too, where I was eating this cookie. I was with some other cousins and talking about different generations and traditions. And so with that, I am attempting a paleo malana recipe this week.

I haven't made these cookies in years. I made them like many years ago. So it's been a while. And my kids have been actually on my case to try to make Greek cookies 'cause they love them too. They've also been to the same. Greek aunt's house and eaten them. So I am into mena. [00:21:00] Beautiful. Yes, I will be into those as well.

I'm sure you'll, I think the thing that I've been into, or one of the things that I'm noticing because it's been the holiday season, I've been around some people that I haven't been around in a while. Some new faces reconnecting with people. And one of the things that CO has come up is music.

I think music around the holidays is something that we engage in a different way throughout the year. And so something fun that I've been doing with people that I'm just getting conversations with is what are your top five artist? And it. I like to do it in a group setting actually.

'cause then it gets people thinking and I've really enjoyed hearing who people enjoy listening to, the reasons why they enjoy listening to. And you can actually get into really good conversations with people and just. How much music is a part of people's lives. I think just drawing that out, and [00:22:00] it's not just a big part of my life, but it's, it's a huge part of our culture.

It's a just a huge part of being in the world, creating art. And so I've been into finding out what are people's top five, artists and musicians and all the different genres and you get to learn a little bit more about people. 'cause you're like, oh, I wouldn't have pegged you as a instrumental or a classical person, or I wouldn't have pegged you as a rap person, but it's, it is been a fun way to get to know people.

So that's what I've been into. Thank you so much for joining us. It was great to be with you today, and until next week, make it a great week.